The Weight of Mistakes and the Power of Transparency
Most of us have made countless mistakes throughout our lives. Shame often keeps us from admitting them, leading us to hide our past and try to create a different perception of our lives. But today, I want to share part of my story, when I was a single mom. I’ll be open and transparent about my mistakes and the consequences I endured with my daughter due to my disobedience to God and my attempt to fit into a world that offered only emptiness.
The Epidemic of Single Motherhood and Hidden Shame
Single motherhood is not a new phenomenon, though it has certainly worsened in our society. I’m sharing my experiences in the hope that it might help the younger generation or women who’ve walked a similar path. Too many women continue to carry hidden shame, regret, and feelings of unworthiness from their past choices. If you’re reading this and feel alone in your struggle, know that you are not. We don’t have to live in shame or silence.
The Pain of Choices and the Consequences of Rebellion
As women, we often carry the consequences of our decisions alone. After experiencing abuse in my relationship with my daughter’s biological father, I was left with low self-esteem, shame, sadness, and a sense of being lost. I threw myself into work and school, trying to improve my life and give my daughter a better future. But the pain and emptiness I felt led me to seek validation in the lies of the world. I found myself in one empty relationship after another, and I gave myself to men I had no business being with.
Protecting Our Children and Seeking God’s Wisdom
As single moms, it is our responsibility to protect our children not only from harm but also from others who might be carrying their own pain and spreading it. A close friend of mine, a nurse, once told me about men who prey on single moms, intentionally looking for opportunities to exploit children. This was a hard truth to swallow, but it’s something we must recognize and protect our children from. Single moms, protect your children not only from other men and women, but also from other children—children who may have been abused themselves and are now repeating the harm that was done to them. I did not have that wisdom, and was unable to protect my daughter as I should have, and this ultimately led to her abuse. It’s incredibly hard to admit, but I take responsibility for how my selfishness and irresponsibility hurt her. Women, pray, discern, and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you into the right relationships—if it’s God’s will. It’s normal to long for companionship and a family, but we must be careful not to let our pain cloud our judgment, leading us to make decisions that go against God’s perfect plan for our lives.
Breaking Free from Lies and Embracing God’s Truth
Why do we, as women, do this to ourselves? We’re told by the world that we need to be strong, independent, and capable of doing it all without God or a man. But these are lies straight from the enemy. I went through these struggles because of my rebellion against God, and the enemy tried to lead me down a tragic path. But God had a different plan. Genesis 50:20 reminds us, “But as for you, you meant evil against me; but God meant it for good.” God can take the evil the enemy meant for harm and use it for good, as long as we repent, reject sin, and follow His will for our lives.
There Is Hope—A New Beginning in Christ
Do you feel alone? Weary, betrayed, frustrated, or hurt by your divorce? Is this the end of the road? Do we have to remain stuck in shame, regret, and the burdens of our past? No! There is hope in Jesus. Tell Him how you feel—be brutally honest and transparent, because He already knows! There’s something powerful about speaking out loud what you’re feeling, revealing sin so the enemy no longer has control over you. Jesus accepts us as we are, but He doesn’t leave us there. He cleanses us, renews us, and transforms us into something new. If you’re a single mom reading this, know that you are worth so much more than the world has told you or what your own regrets have convinced you.
Today, turn to Jesus. Repent, confess your sins, and lay your burdens at His feet. He will purify you, change your life, and bring you into a new life of peace and hope. Seek Jesus today—your redemption and healing are waiting for you.
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